Involving your distance learner in community activities is a great way for them to meet new friends and develop new skills and hobbies. But your heart may sink if, after months of investing time and money in recreational activities, your student utters the phrase, "I want to quit."
There are no concrete rules when it comes to quitting. Some argue that continued participation teaches commitment, while others argue letting students quit helps them identify their true interests. The decision should ultimately depend on the individual student and situation.
To encourage your student to give an activity a fair chance, you can create a home environment that supports your learner's activities. Here are some suggestions from music professors and coaches about involving your student in activities, embracing the activities at home, and confronting the desire to quit.
– Before your student gets involved in an activity, talk about the many types of organizations available in your community. Discuss the time and monetary commitments involved and decide together which will suit your student best.
– As with any new toy or experience, the initial excitement of learning to play a new instrument or joining a new team will begin to dwindle over time. Prepare for this by setting activity-centered goals for your student from day one to keep them engaged. Encourage them to play a particular number of measures from a certain piece of music or make a certain number of free throws before leaving practice.
– Present your student with small, occasional incentives for meeting the goals you set. To your student, a concert, theatrical performance, or sporting event can seem far off in the future. Instead of using an event as motivation, schedule a mini recital for friends and family or plan a game of basketball with the neighborhood kids as a goal and reward for hard work.
– Actively introduce your student to activities at an early age. If you take an interest in the activity, your learner is likely to follow suit. Show them your love of music by talking about the tunes you listen to and practicing your own instrument if you play one. Help your musician determine a regular practice schedule to avoid arguments and encourage daily practice. If your student prefers sports, share your love of baseball by playing a game of catch a few times each week and watching your favorite team together.
Despite the support you can provide, sometimes students still want to quit. Before you give in or turn down the request, take some time to listen and find out what sparked the plea. Communicate with your student in a casual manner to find out what they dislike about the activity. Once the issue is apparent, address it as best you can. If bullies bother your student at practice, talk to the coach about possible solutions. Transfer to a new club or ensemble if the philosophy of the organization is an issue.
Once you've evaluated the situation and tested possible solutions, it's time to make a decision. Sometimes it's okay to quit, especially if the activity hinders your student's grades, emotional wellbeing, or physical health. Let your student know that it's ok to switch activities, too. If your learner doesn't like the instrument or sport they choose, give them the freedom to try another. Encourage them to play through the next concert or finish the season and then switch gears to try something new.